Rounding up 2012!

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Big update because I've been too busy fingering myself to care about anything else

So yeah, I was supposed to post things here wasn’t I? To be honest I’ve been so busy being famous that I just forgot all about it. But y’know, I can’t leave my fans waiting can I? After all they’re the ones that have to gargle my wilkins backstage and - well I don’t want to piss them off to extent that they bite.

We’ve had a couple of exceptional gigs over the past few weeks. We’ve been played on four different radio stations. We’ve been interviewed on one (special shout out to Ross Cummins). We’ve started filming our first music video. We’ve got another exciting gig on Saturday. Everything’s coming up Footprints!

I’d like, in attempt to be vaguely coherent, to break things down a little bit (maybe into sub-blogs or mini-blogs or whatever the hell you want to call them).

January 19^th – Ragnarock – Rumes, Preston

I have to say – this gig was incredible. The crowd response was intense. A FUCKING conga line?! You guys are genius. The guys that put the gig on were superb. The sound on stage could have been a little easier going but it was more than made up for by the atmosphere. It was nice to play on an actual stage again too, although we don’t want to get used to it just yet.

A few hiccups here and there, such as everyone falling over cables and pulling them out. But it was all part of the show. The bands we played with (Fire in the Empire and Bury the Conscious) were so fucking tight compared to us – but I don’t mind saying that we totally stole the show. I put it all down to windmilling, cross-dressing and generally just not giving much of a shit.

All in all a big success! Cannot thank the crowd enough for the amazing reaction. Pretty pissed off that I had to drive home so I could get to work early (that’s not rock and roll) but I believe the other guys had a rather thrilling (if wet) night.

What we learned:

• Preston is still epic
• Footprints fans are by far the craziest fans we’ve yet to experience
• Don’t trip over leads
• Saffin’s snow angels on the dance floor are inspiration only found in the deepest depths of intoxication
• Jumping off a six-foot stage doesn’t sound as high as it feels when you’re doing it
• Make sure your mic is working before you begin your set
• Free beer is free
• Girls don’t get their boobs out when we heckle them, because we’re not KISS yet.

February 1^st – New Revolution – Retro Bar, Manchester

Our first Manchester gig! This, along with the Rumes gig and that mammoth one back at Nantwich Civic Hall in 2007, is one of the best gigs Footprints have ever played. Seriously, the combination of a cramped, sticky, sweaty atmosphere and lots of people singing along to all the words.... Well I went and did a big spaff didn’t I?

I couldn’t tell from where I was but I think we pulled the biggest crowd of the night again (if we didn’t then I’m just going to believe that we did anyway to satisfy my large, throbbing, veiny ego). And it was definitely the tightest we’ve ever been (in terms of musical integrity – my arse was pretty lax).

There wasn’t quite as much crowd movement for this gig as the last one, but I’m going to put that down the small space. Everyone is forgiven because everyone was singing! And it was awesome to see people coming from so far afield to see us! Liverpool, Preston, Crewe to name a few.

Massive shout out to the other bands of the night Propax, Carnage, Shades of Avalon and Junker, they were all great guys. And cheers to Ste for putting the night on! It was all brilliantly organised and ran as smoothly as a hand would over an underage girl’s fanny spot.

What we learned:

• People know the words?!
• Green lights blind bass players
• There is a fine line between being merry and too drunk to play a gig – Russ tight-roped that line
• Me and My Ironing Board sounds awesome
• Tommo really, really dislikes attention
• Tiny stage means Russ has to spend time with the commoners in the crowd
• Uhm...can’t remember I was drunk.

And the rest!

Yeah so we’re filming a video for the song Every STD in the Book at the moment. We’ve done our first shoot and it went brilliantly. Chris (sorry, ‘John Nocturne’) has been brilliant with us thus far, just giving us this opportunity is incredible. Just the sheer thought of seeing a Footprints video involving strip poker, penile discharge, masturbation, vomit, cake baking ape scientists, and corpse burying is enough to bring stiffy central to pantyland.

I won’t give any more than that away right now. Next shoot is on 4^th March. We might need some folk to be extras in it too, so get in touch if you’re interested.

Other than that there’s some BIG NEWS coming up. I’m talking something mightily girthy. And of course there’s this fundraiser gig on Saturday 11^th at the Whitworth! Get on that! There’s cheap booze, bands, cake, art. Lots of things really. Oh AND we have a special guest drummer in the form of Sam Bucanan (of Bathroom Crooners fame) because Tommo’s away solving world hunger or some bollocks like that. We attempted to teach Sam the songs last night... The drummer doesn’t need to know the songs right?

BIZZLE

Russ

xx

THE GIG!

Well, well, well... Last night was incredible. I don't really know where to begin!

Maybe I'll start by saying last night was by far the best night I've had in ages. Thank you so much for everyone who came down to The Dog & Partridge and supported us. The crowd reaction and participation was truly astounding and, well, scary. To look up and see a swarm of folk wearing Footprints in the Custard t-shirts and singing along to the chorus of 'Things I Would Do Sexually to Hayley Williams' was disturbing to say the least. But in a good way, I felt pretty damn sexy all night after that (although that may have been the tutu?).

Of course everything didn't go perfectly but on a whole it went mostly according to plan. Mostly losing my voice half-way through the set, Ian's bass strap snapping, Tommo forgetting how 'Up Your Altar' goes... All things to improve on for next time.

I'd like to make a few special thank-yous. Thank you to Beak and Shaun for getting all the artwork sorted, you guys have been amazing. Thank you to Ruth for screen-printing all the t-shirts, they look fantastic. Thank you to Donny for making the banner and sorting out all the merch on the night, I mean let's be honest, we'd never get anything done without you. Thank you to Crosso for being our psycho-fan. Thank you to everyone that came all the way from Crewe to see us (Maj, Jay, Matt, Sam, Andy, Dad), that was amazing. Thank you to Kyle for coming along and supporting us and getting involved for the finale. Thank you to Mark for sorting everything out and giving us the gig! Thank you to the D&P for having us and supplying us with booze. Thank you to Hello Bamboo for just being awesome in general - fucking loved your set.

Then of course we all proceeded to get well and truly shitfaced. I don't entirely remember all of the night but it ended up with me playing Mario Kart, so that's no bad thing. Oh... and Ian got up in the middle of the night, took off his jeans and pissed all over them. That's how this band rolls.

What we learned:

• Tutus are cool
• The Great Outdoors has too many lyrics
• Preston's beer is so cheap you piss on your clothes
• We can make £100 in a night if our merch girl has big boobs
• Tutus are cool
• Last minute planning is stressful
• Russ's car is definitely not built for band gear
• Mario Kart is easier when you're hammered
• Jager shots before a set is a good plan
• Our fans are incredible
• More girls like us than previously thought
• None of the aforementioned girls went down on Russ
• Russ is going to have a cry-wank
• We need more gigs
• Tutus are cool

Russ

Holy fuck the CDs have arrived. I've just been frolicking around with them naked. It was by far the sexiest thing that's ever happened to me, apart from that time I met a girl who was called Hayley Williams and I tinkled on her lady mess (that actually happened).

So, yeah. If anybody fancies a copy of the album we're selling them for £4. Although of course if you don't want a physical copy you can still download it for free from the Bandcamp or the Facebook page. Also T-shirts and ink have arrived and The Amazing Ruth will be screen-printing our merch shortly. £6 for a shirt or £8 for a CD/shirt combo. Minted.

In other news the Christmas song, which I can confirm is named 'When Santa Spaffed in my Stocking', is in production. It's sounding awesome and it's catchy as hell. That should be landing in your face in the next few weeks if everything goes according to plan.

Perhaps the most boner-worthy note is the gig. The Dog & Partridge in Preston will be hosting the event. There will be beer, there will be squirty cream - Oh God yes. That's the 29th, we'll be playing with the, frankly hilarious, Hello Bamboo. Can't wait.

A possible gig in Manchester for the 6th December and more gigs in the pipeline for 2012. Plenty of new songs shagging their way into production too. Whitty's a musical monster. Especially looking forward to the disturbing 'Make War Not Lovecraft' which details the sexual explorations of a veteran sea-dog when he encounters a cephalopod.

Also we seem to building a lot of interest globally, which is bloody exciting. A rather nice Russian dude called Dmitry is reviewing our album, we have a growing fan-base in North America and Brazil, which is bizarre, and YouTube reckons all the women that like us are between the ages of 13 and 17.

We're genuinely really busy at the moment, it's awesome.

Oh yeah, I gave Kunt from Kunt and the Gang a copy of our CD last night. I don't remember what I said to him because I was wasted but I'm pretty sure I was awesome. I also remember talking to some hot goth chicks but I imagine that didn't get anywhere because I woke up fully clothed and with a wet patch on my floor.

I digress. Mainly because I've ran out of things to talk about. So if you want a CD or a shirt just give us a shout. And make sure you're at the gig!

Peace

Russ

facebook.com/footprintsinthecustardband

footprintsinthecustard.bandcamp.com

'Every Hole Is A Goal' is out!

It's finally happened! After all those sweaty sessions in Ian's bedroom and all that beer and cake - the new album is finally available for download!

It's been a long time coming (in stark contrast to Ian's bedroom routine), in fact we've been working on the album on and off for about three years. Why has it taken us so long? In usual Footprints fashion I'm going to blame booze and women. It's not because we're lazy. Not at all.

Now's probably a good time to be retrospective of the whole album creating process. To be honest I don't remember much of it in vivid detail (booze and women) but I remember there was a lot of shouting and cake.

I do remember when we recorded the vocals for 'F in the C' at Salford Uni. I was jumping around like a mad man, screaming my little heart out, only to discover that a crowd of people had gathered in the mixing room to watch me through the glass. If I had any credibility as an artist before (which I didn't), then I certainly don't have it now.

I suppose a perk of the album having taken so long to produce is having all the various demo CDs littered around my car. It's actually made it so I can't find anything I want to listen to because every bloody CD I put in blasts 'Everything I Want In A Girl' back at me. It is nice to see the "progression" of the music though (notice the quotation marks).

As for the reception... I have to say our "fans" (quotations) are the most loyal bunch of retards I've ever had the pleasure of shouting at. Cheers guys. I seriously can't wait to get this shit back on stage.

Russ

Download the full album for free here: http://footprintsinthecustard.bandcamp.com

Footprints are back!

Well… it’s been a long time coming but it’s finally happened. We’re back. Last night was the first band practice in four years that we actually had a full line-up for. It was beautiful, it was warm and my God it was sweaty.

Big shout out to Tommo and Ross for picking up the material so quickly and slipping easily into the Footprints groove.

Oh, and turns out if we put our mind to it we can play seven songs in 19 minutes – maybe we’ll have to add to our set or, you know, play the songs at the right speed.

Plenty of gigs in the pipeline! Plus new album out soon and even newer material (including a Christmas song) on the way… Exciting times!

More to follow…

Russ